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My son grew up and I do not like his friends

When little not so easy to raise, we are in high demand and sometimes, we run out. But deep down we know that things are more or less under control. We bring with us everywhere we go, but as they grow they also claim or impose their preferences.

But then grow too, and suddenly one day we realize that we no longer have absolute control of the situation. The boys begin to choose where to go and who to be. They go to a much wider world than they did under the gaze of their parents.

Adolescence is a stage in which young people should be independent and therefore detached from their parents. Who am I, what will be my life plan, where do I go?, Are the new issues surrounding their heads at that stage of life. That which is commonly called rebellion is nothing more and nothing less than a search of his personality. Its outputs are no longer limited to the circle of relatives or friends of the family. And often end up surrounding himself with girls and boys that parents do not convince us at all. "Is that why I struggled so much raising him?" Adults complain often.

And there the fighting starts, pulls and chaos characteristic of families with adolescents. What can we do when we do not like the friends of our children?

"We must distinguish two situations well," says clinical psychologist Gloria Birencwajg. "Because when parents lose control unit and displayed children's fears. A scenario is simply not we like these people, "says Birencwajg. "And another very different is when we realize that with this company our children are at a real risk." He adds that if the environment is really dangerous, parents should intervene with effective limit setting, and if you still feel that they will hand the problem it is best to seek professional help.

Many other times are the guys who end up giving a lesson to their parents, for example, with themes that adults have lived in a conflict or as a taboo and is young people who bring them back into the family so they can be processed.

The psychologist noted that a typical case of adolescent foster children, often meet with people from very different social level of its family. In the search appears the issue of adoption.

Announcements and accompanied

"It is essential to have a level of communication between parents and children. Although it is not easy, because at this stage the guys want to get rid of their parents, "says Birencwajg.

According to the psychologist, is very important to the way family life is organized, for example, meet once a day to share a meal or fixed how will the weekend. Kids do not have to be away completely for those two days. "It is essential to accompany them, do not watch them. Because if they feel that control will surely put away immediately. " Meet

friends can be a good channel to learn about potential dangers. "In cases of girls with anorexia or bulimia, which often warn adults about the problem are those friends," says the psychologist.

One way to approach, for example, is that the kids can meet at home with them. Thus, parents can know their close circle of friends. Yes, it is important not to intrude, but respect their space. Give

Trust is also another key point, because they themselves must learn to care. When we want to impose control and closed standards do not listen is when they start the lies, cover-ups.

"So parents know is fostering a climate of communication," explains Gloria Birencwajg. "Sometimes, a resource that is very good news is that they tell their stories to the kids or instead identify, differentiate." Tips

note:

-Foster communication. Having

-day moments to chat with them.

-Listen to your needs.

-give them confidence.

-accompanied without feeling watched.

-know circle of friends with whom they meet.

-Telling how their parents were their age.

"If the kids are in a situation of risk, set precise limits or ask for help from a professional.

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The , desperate

Every day I am more convinced that we expect others to think, discuss, resolve or interpret things the same way we would. It's amazing how the same situation against all those involved react differently. Keeping this in mind can make a big difference when relating to others, especially if we are to develop a common project.

We have a group of friends working together to push forward a very special business. Although each has a different role, expectations are not met and, often, friendship should be an advantage, makes some evade their responsibilities covered in the level of respect, trust and camaraderie between them. And, of course, have begun to emerge, claims, justifications and discomfort ...

Like them, the expectation can happen to prevent us from finding the solution to our disagreements and differences, enhance all the strengths we have and, therefore, enjoy what we are doing together. How often do we bother and discuss with loved ones because they failed to resolve a situation as we have done, or just get discouraged and we get frustrated when they do not appreciate and value our suggestions? Will they be able to behave as we would like to do so ... We can not assume that it will, because each of us is special and unique individual characteristics, tastes, interests, approaches and points of view completely personal.

If we present this idea at the time of relating to others, we would have less friction and void, because would be more willing to accept them as they are, their limitations and strengths. We still have time to review our relations, especially that we have with our loved ones to wonder whether we have really allowed to express their ideas, desires and capabilities without limit.

relations to work and make us feel at ease we must learn to act out our true thoughts, feelings and needs, for only then that other person will know and give us what we really want. Otherwise, it will happen we will live the relationship only from our point of view, with false expectations, demands and frustrations. Do not make judgments or mental images of the attitude or behavior that others will assume. Let us be clear about our ideas, needs or expectations, and thus avoid the disagreements and conflicts that usually keep them.



be open to understand, accept and respect the other's point of view, taking into account individual differences, we will be more tolerant and understanding and at the same time, we will learn, grow and enrich our lives.

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The most terrifying ten bridges

Their function is to help us cross rivers, ditches or cliffs. However, there are some that are not suitable for the squeamish: only cross becomes an adventure in itself. Here are the top ten of terror.

Bridge 1.Aiguille du Midi (France).
is almost impossible for you not from vertigo. This impressive bridge is located in the French Alps, particularly near the town of Chamonix. To reach it you have to take a cable car that climbs over 3,000 feet in twenty minutes. "The only advantage to cross? Is short (has only 200 meters), so you can run if you get a panic attack.

2. Royal Gorge Bridge (Colorado, USA).
It is the highest suspension bridge in the country. Built in 1929, but until 1982 did not put a foundation to protect it from wind. Is over 280 meters high and located on the Arkansas River.

Photo Hustvedt, Wikimedia Commons.

3. Trift Suspension Bridge (Switzerland).
Cross it assures us an adrenaline rush. It is a pedestrian bridge was built in 2004 to gain access to an isolated cabin by a glacier located in the Swiss Alps. The impression is brutal, especially until 2009, the year that had the detail of putting a handrail. The bridge is 99 meters high.

4. Carrick-a-Rede Rope Bridge (Northern Ireland).
first thing: nobody has ever fallen over this bridge. However, many tourists decide to return to their destination by ship rather than return to cross this bridge. The platform was built by fishermen who wanted access to a small island for salmon fishing. At first, the bridge was a simple pendant table, but with the curiosity of tourists the authorities decided to substitute a more stable building with two handrails. Is 30 meters high.

Van Helsing Photo

Wikimedia Commons. Wikimedia Commons.

5. Capilano Suspension Bridge (Canada). Originally
Built in 1889, this bridge of planks of cedar is very narrow and unstable. Of course, the views are stunning: a river runs along the platform in the middle of a forest near Vancouver. If you are not Miedico, wait until next spring, visitors can access the bridge via a series of suspended walkways that will join a cliff. Is 70 meters high.

Photo Leonardo G, Wikimedia Commons.

6. Mackinac Bridge (Michigan, USA).
Many locals get so nervous that they are unable to cross. Therefore, the authorities in Michigan, United States, have launched a service driver to take you car to the other side of the bridge. What great detail.

Photo Dehk, Wikimedia Commons.

7. Ojuela Bridge (Mexico).
This platform leads to a ghost town, deserted by the end of their mine. Fortunately, now coated steel cables that bridge, but when the German engineer Santiago Minhguin built it used only wood. It is situated 100 meters high.

Photo Peter Burger, Wikimedia Commons.

8. Chesapeake Bay Bridge (Maryland, USA).
With more than 180 meters height, connects the east and west of Maryland. Cross this bridge is not simple: the storms are frequent and visibility is almost nil. Sometimes the cars have to stop in the middle of the platform-five miles, and expect to stop the rains.

Photo Ben Schumin, Wikimedia Commons.

9. Monkey Bridges (Vietnam).
bridge is called monkeys because you have to encorvarte like them if you want to cross. They are made of bamboo and can meet them if you visit the Mekong Delta.

10. Hussaini Hanging Bridge (Pakistan).
This bridge is only suitable for the more adventurous. It has no stability and crosses the Hunza River, famous for its strong currents. To make matters worse, while one crosses it, you'll find the remains of the previous bridge, broken wood, cables hanging .... In 2010 it flooded, but they are rising again.

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The worst cities to live

The electronic journal The Huffington Post recently published a list of the most polluted in the world. In the list was Linfen, in the so called Chinese coal belt, where breathing is equivalent to one day smoke three packs of snuff. There are cities like that, do you want know what?

In these cities, when someone tends usually pick their clothes dirtier than the left. Neither gets rid of dirt United States, with severely damaged areas such as Los Angeles or Phoenix metropolitan area. In Europe, the star is the largest city in the continent. The report explains that the British Parliament in London 50.000 premature deaths occur each year because of pollution.

London, England / Getty Images. Disaster

Another tanker trash pit is the Niger Delta in Nigeria, a region where rampant traditionally large multinational empires as British Petroleum or Shell. It is estimated that the water has been spilled about eight million barrels of crude in the last half century.

Niger Delta, Nigeria / AP.

In Indonesia, Citarium has the world's most polluted river, the inhabitants drink also. La Oroya, Peru suffers from factory discharges Ron Doe, spewing hundreds of thousands of kilos of sulfur dioxide, lead and arsenic in the environment.

La Oroya, Peru / AP.

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birth mortality

Russia is another points in more ecological disasters. Dzerzhinsk was during the Cold War a population of chemical weapons manufacturer whose effectiveness crushed its inhabitants far more than the enemy. An estimated 300,000 people affected. Currently the municipal mortality rate exceeds the birth rate. Who is going to want to have children in these conditions?

Dzerzhinsk / AP. Spontaneous combustion

In any case, and not on the list, log Tardecilla informative, Norilsk has been described as "the worst city in the world to live." This is another Russian city, with 230,000 inhabitants, situated in the center of the dreaded Siberia. Among its many disadvantages noted that life expectancy is limited to 44.

Norilsk, Siberia / Getty Images.

Ecology is so heinous that trees can ignite spontaneously from industrial chemicals contained in the soil. The only positive is that there are no homeless, no one could survive on the streets at extreme temperatures of 56 degrees below zero. On the other hand, missing the bus on a cold morning can cost you your life.